From the Contents of Esoteric Classes

97. EL, Berlin, 1-7-'12

Yesterday we said that a man is connected with a doppelganger, that the Luciferic spirit Samael places him outside us and makes us aware of this. Through desires and passions that we previously avoided but that are not clinging to our double, it sometimes happens that he wants us to get carried away by anger or other things. This doesn't make much difference in the average person, but it shouldn't happen to an esoteric; he must watch himself more; an esoteric's life of feelings and drives becomes quite different.

One shouldn't think that a man becomes loveless and indifferent. His love is deepened and raised to a higher level; it becomes more selfless and ready for sacrifice.

An esoteric training that teaches the eradication of love and sympathy is on the wrong track entirely. For by changing our feeling life we get a better feeling for art and the world's beauty.

Also we shouldn't lament about psychic losses, or say: I can't do anything about myself — but in such despairing moments one should repeatedly say: Patience. Be strong.

The same applies when one thinks that one hasn't made any progress because one hasn't had any experiences in higher worlds.

What should be attained in esoteric training is soul loneliness. This must remain the soul's basic mood and shouldn't be shaken by anything, even when we meet the most beloved people. The spiritual world's portals open through solitude. This is the only thing that conditions pure spiritual life. But this doesn't' mean that one should deliberately look for solitude or avoid one's duties in the world; we should let this lonely feeling awaken in our soul, and not silence it through foolish thoughts, etc.

It's also very helpful if one does not want to change one's exercises frequently. It's best to do an exercise for a whole lifetime, but to do it right, and namely in such a way that ever new impulses are awakened in us when we increasingly immerse ourselves in the exercise. For instance:

In pure rays of light
Gleams the Godhead of the world …

Here one shouldn't just imagine radiating light rays that symbolize the divine — one should imagine the Gods' forces that take possession of our interior, and then feel great thankfulness that should be carried into the cosmos — swim in the feeling of thanks and feel united with the Godhead. One can often only hang onto this feeling for seconds, but after continued practice one will be able to have it much longer.

One is often called back to reality by a ringing sound, but this exercise leaves one with a feeling of being one with God and mankind — quite different from a feeling of loneliness.

Chatter is a common sin. Whatever one discloses about the results of one's exercises is lost for the pupil. One should make this clear to oneself. It always signifies a weakening of the etheric body; people with a weak etheric body are always talkative. That's why it's helpful for us to close off our inner life as a secret. One could at most enrich one's esoteric life by discussing esoteric communications and truths with friends at the same spiritual level, but it's important that the right mood be present here. The forces and strength that permit us to advance grow through silence.

In the spirit lay the germ of my body.
And the spirit has imprinted in my body
The eyes of sense,
That through them I may see
The lights of bodies.
And the spirit has imprinted in my body
Reason and sensation
And feeling and will,
That through them I may perceive bodies
And act upon them.
In the spirit lay the germ of my body.
In my body lies the germ of the spirit.
And I will incorporate into my spirit
The super-sensible eyes
That through them I may behold the light of spirits.
And I will imprint in my spirit
Wisdom and power and love,
So that through me the spirits may act
And I become a self-conscious organ
Of their deeds.
In my body lies the germ of the spirit.